If you can master the art of timing, then you’ll be a champ in the bedroom!
It might not be exactly what you want for yourself or your partner, but if you are climaxing too sooner than expected, then there’s a chance that sex might not be all that enjoyable for you and your spouse.
This issue is popularly known as premature ejaculation. It can be both frustrating and humiliating at the same time. And even though so many men out there are not too open about it, it is a very depressing issue common among men in our society today. More common than you’d expect.
And even if premature ejaculation is a source of great concern to you, you do not have to die in silence or just live with it. There are a couple of things you can do to get yourself back and last longer in bed.
For starters let’s have a general overview of what exactly premature ejaculation is, before looking into how one can combat this often annoying situation.
And to understand premature ejaculation, we must, first of all, understand how ejaculation in men happens generally.
How Does Ejaculation Work?
Just like for most processes in the body, the CNS – The Central Nervous System plays a very important role in the male ejaculatory process.
So here’s how it goes…
During intercourse, at the point when the man has reached a particular level of excitement, signals are then sent from the brain to the reproductive organs. This causes other forms of stimulation which in turn causes semen to be discharged through the penis (a process known as ejaculation). Ejaculation can as well be held back by the central nervous system.
Stages of Ejaculation
Ejaculation has 2 stages:
- The emission stage, and
- The expulsion stage.
Stage 1: Emission
Emission is that stage in the ejaculation process where the sperm moves from the testicles to the prostate and mixes with seminal fluid to make semen. The vasa deferentia are tubes that assist in the movement of the sperm from the testicles through the prostate to the base of the penis.
Stage 2: Expulsion
At the expulsion stage, the muscles at the lower end of the penis begin to contract. This is the process that eventually expels semen out of the penis. Typically, and in most cases, ejaculation and orgasm occur simultaneously.
In extremely rare cases, a few men tend to orgasm without ejaculation. But whichever be the case, the erection begins to gradually go down at this point.
How Then Does Premature Ejaculation Come In?
Inasmuch as there’s no set time a man should ejaculate during intercourse, it’s probably too early if you ejaculate or orgasm less than a minute into the intercourse. Whether she tells you or not bro, premature ejaculation is usually a cause of worry and sexual complaint in relationships. And most of the affected men tend to leave their spouses unsatisfied.
It’s an issue because when your little man is down, the urge to continue with intercourse instantly diminishes. And when this happens too sooner than expected, it leaves you and your spouse little time to bond together.
Because of the so many outrageous sex mentality passed across in the media and movies these days, a lot of men now feel that they have to go hours and hours in bed for them to be regarded as a sex champion! This is entirely not the case bro.
As a matter of fact, premature ejaculation is only a matter of concern if you:
- Continuously ejaculate within less than a minute of engaging in sexual intercourse.
- Constantly cannot delay ejaculation during intercourse. Note that delaying ejaculation is also art you can research on and learn.
- Usually feel bothered and disappointed. And if this makes you want to avoid sexual relations with your spouse.
Symptoms of Premature Ejaculation
Inasmuch as the fundamental symptom of premature ejaculation is the inability to delay discharge for about a minute after penetration. However, when most men report premature ejaculation, in most cases when they’re diagnosed, the symptoms they are experiencing don’t exactly qualify as premature ejaculation.
Causes Of Premature Ejaculation
While a lot of pieces of research are still ongoing on the subject of premature ejaculation, a lot of reports have also been released on the subject. For now, scientists believe that PE in most cases results from some psychological factors, or biological factors, or a combination of both factors.
Here are some psychological factors that can be responsible for PE:
- Early exposure to sexual practices,
- Sexual molestation,
- Low self-esteem,
- Worrying about premature ejaculation itself,
- Too much excitement that might increase your inclination to rush through sexual encounters.
Other psychological factors that can play a role include:
- Erectile dysfunction. It can very common for men with erectile dysfunction to constantly experience premature ejaculation.
- Stress. Stress is particularly not a good thing. It poses a lot of threat to your general health. And your sexual experience is also not an exception.
- Relationship problems. This is usually the case if you did not experience premature ejaculation in your previous relationships. Then your current experience could be as a result of the current relationship issues you are having.
Several biological factors might contribute to premature ejaculation, including:
- Abnormal hormone levels
- Abnormal levels of brain chemicals called neurotransmitters
- Inflammation and infection of the prostate or urethra
- Inherited traits
Various factors can increase your risk of premature ejaculation, including:
- Erectile dysfunction. As stated earlier, if you constantly have the problem of keeping up with an erection, then you may also be at the risk of experiencing premature ejaculation.
- Stress and Anxiety.
There are so many issues PE can cause. Let’s highlight some of them;
- Relationship problems. If you do not have an understanding partner, then there might be serious relationship issues that might arise. Your spouse may not be comfortable with the degree of sexual intimacy shared. Discussing this can be an important step towards finding a solution.
- Lack of Concentration. PE can cause distress, and can ultimately lower your level of productivity as you go about your daily activities.
- Stress A well-known complication of premature ejaculation is stress in the relationship.
- Fertility problems. Premature ejaculation can sometimes make fertilization difficult for couples who are trying to have a baby if ejaculation doesn’t occur intravaginally.
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Prescriptions, guidelines, and sexual strategies that tend to delay discharge (or a combination of these) can help improve sex for you and your spouse.
There are common treatment options for premature ejaculation which include;
- behavioral techniques,
- topical anesthetics,
- medications and
Remember that it may require some time to discover the treatment or blend of treatments that will work for you.
Behavioral treatment plus drug therapy might be the most efficient way.
Pelvic floor exercises
A weak pelvic floor muscle can reduce your ability to delay ejaculation. Pelvic floor exercises (Kegel exercises) can help in strengthening these muscles.
Here’s how to perform the pelvic floor exercise:
- You will need to locate the appropriate muscle. To do this, try to stop urinating midway or you can try to tighten up your pelvic muscles, with the aim of preventing you from urinating. These moves utilize the pelvic floor muscles.
- Tightening of the pelvic floor muscles. The tightening and relaxing of the pelvic floor muscles can help make it stronger. Practice it a few times in a day and you might see remarkable results. It’s simple, it just involves contraction and relaxation of the pelvic muscles for seconds. It can be done in any position; sitting or standing.
The pause-squeeze technique
The pause-squeeze technique is also great for combating PE. Here’s how it works:
- Begin sexual activity as you normally would with your spouse, including stimulation of the penis, until you feel almost ready to ejaculate.
- Have your spouse squeeze the tip of your penis, at the point where the head (glans) joins the shaft, and maintain the squeeze for few seconds, until the urge to ejaculate goes away, in which case you can continue with sexual intercourse.
- You can repeat the process as often as possible. And also note that you can do the squeezing yourself.
After practicing the technique for some time, there comes a point when you are able to penetrate your spouse and hold ejaculation longer than you normally would. Also when you must have gotten used to the process, the feeling of knowing how and when to delay ejaculation might become a habit to you, and you may not need the technique anymore.
The stop-start strategy
If the pause-squeeze technique causes you any form of pain at all, another technique you can adopt is the stop-start strategy. This strategy works by you stopping sexual stimulation/penetration just as you feel the urge to ejaculate, wait a few seconds for your arousal to go down, then continue again.
In some cases, condoms equally tend to reduce penis sensation, which can in turn help in delaying ejaculation.
Inasmuch as there’s no sure way to guarantee recovery, with these behavioral practices, you can battle premature ejaculation greatly. Remember to continue working with your primary health care provider to discover other solutions.
- Anesthetic creams and sprays. These creams are usually robbed on the penis between 10 – 20 minutes before the commencement of sexual intercourse.
- A lidocaine-prilocaine cream.
Please note that topical anesthetic agents can cause potential reactions and side effects. And as such, proper medical advice should be sort before beginning use.
There are lots of oral medications out there that claim to delay ejaculation. However, you must research the ones that are affirmed by the Food and Drug Administration.
Some of the drug’s prescriptions might state you take them daily, while some might require you to take it some minutes or hours before intercourse.
- Antidepressants. Paroxetine, fluoxetine, escitalopram. It takes about half a month of treatment before you see the full result of using these. It can be less in some cases (between 7-10 days).
- Analgesics. Tramadol (Ultram) like we generally know is a medication commonly used to treat pain. Part of its side effect is delay ejaculation. However, it has some unwanted side effects such as nausea, headache, sleepiness, and dizziness.
Analgesics like tramadol can be recommended when SSRIs are not effective. Tramadol should not be used alongside an SSRI.
- Phosphodiesterase-5 inhibitors. Eg: Sildenafil (an example of which are Viagra, Revatio), tadalafil ( such as Cialis, Adcirca), or vardenafil (like Levitra, Staxyn).
- Dapoxetine. This is an example of an SSRI frequently used as the first medication for premature ejaculation in some countries.
- Modafinil (like Provigil)
- Silodosin (such as Rapaflo)
Seeking counsel is one of the best steps you can take if you feel premature ejaculation is a major challenge in your relationship. This methodology involves discussing with a health care provider about your situation. The sessions can help you reduce nervousness, and will ultimately help profer a solution to the problem.
Discussing the issue with your spouse can go a very long way in battling it, and making you feel much better. It is entirely true especially when you have an understanding spouse.
If you have friends or relations that might be knowledgable, seeking counsel from them might ultimately be a good idea.
When to see a doctor
I want to let you know that premature ejaculation is a case that most primary health care providers come across constantly. So do not feel shy about going to discuss it to discuss the issue with your doctor. He or she must have come across the same issue a couple of times before, and as such, will be able to profer a good solution for you.
Some men have also reported that discussion with a specialist helped them reduce worries about premature ejaculation. So do not hesitate to discuss with a specialist, especially if you’ve tried the behavioral techniques I outlined earlier.
Apart from medications, yoga, reflection, behavioral strategies are a few other alternatives you can try out.
Although premature ejaculation is usually a major source of concern in relationships, you need not worry yourself too much, because as explained earlier, it is completely treatable.
Apart from first trying out the behavioral strategies I mentioned above, speaking with a specialist is yet another significant step you can take. Meanwhile discuss with your spouse and make sure she understands what is going on, and you two can try to figure out what the cause is, and adopt a possible solution.
Thank you very much for reading. Hope you found some information here useful. Please drop me a comment. I would love to hear from you.